No Catchy Title Here!

Hi everyone. Hope you're all doing well. It's been nuts lately! Hope things have been somewhat more calm and less insane for you.

When I first came down to our little DEU, we were swamped and backlogged and it looked like we'd never find the end of the tunnel. We did. And now, we're right back there again. It's a terrible feeling to feel powerless and unable to do your job. I can do it...that's not the issue. It's watching that "to do list" getting bigger and bigger that scares me. I work like a dog all day and yet, the stupid thing gets no smaller. I need to NOT let this stress me out (because it DOES stress me out...something fierce). All I can do is all I can do, right? Remind me of this little simple mantra in the coming days when I am over-the-top stressed again and need a battery re-charge.

We had a wonderful time with my parents when they came to visit last week for Erin's birthday. I still can't believe she is five years old. I got to thinking about something while they were here. (And yes, I know it's common-sensical...whatever!)...I love our history. Our stories. The memories we have and the funny stories that we tell about our lives and the things we've done and been through together. I know every family is probably like this...full of hilarious tales and special moments of yesterday that they smile when they share with new friends or when they recall them together. I guess I am just happy. Happy to be my parents' daughter and my husband's wife and my daughter's mother. They are fantastic people...true blessings from God. Sometimes I still don't feel completely worthy, but obviously God does, and that's all that matters. Mom and Dad are home in Indy now, safe and tired from the trip. It was so wonderful to see them again.

On the topic of Erin's birthday, I've got some photos to share with all of you! (Remember to click on each photo to get a larger view!)



Here's the invitiation I made for Erin's birthday party, which we celebrated at the Olathe Chuck E. Cheese on September the 16th. Stampin' Up products used include stamp sets ("Love Without End" and the now-retired "Dot Invitation"), inks (Certainly Celery, Handsome Hunter, and Pink Passion), cardstock (Certainly Celery and Pretty In Pink), one of the SU bookmarks, pink gingham ribbon, Stampin' Dimensionals, and The Tearing Edge. The mini-glue dots aren't from SU.

Chuck E. loves Erin!



Because Erin's a little princess (she'll tell you as much!), she loves purses and little frilly girly things. I saw this adorable pattern (called "AJ's Wrist Bag") over at Crochetville and I had to make it for her!



I used two full balls of the Sugar 'N Cream cotton yarn in "Playtime" and, I believe, an "H" hook. It worked up wonderfully and it was fun to make! It was also a quick-make, so keep this pattern in mind if you're ever in need of a last-second gift!

A dear friend I met several years ago while interning for the Department of Defense never forgets Erin's birthday. Even though she's far away in miles, she's always in my heart. She sent Erin a darling card and a gift of money for her birthday, and here's the thank-you card I made for her:



I used the following Stampin' Up products to make this card: cardstock (Almost Amethyst), inks (Almost Amethyst, Perfect Plum, and Rose Red), stamp sets ("Mini Messages," "Little Layers Plus," and "Quotes To Live By"), an eyelet (in Perfect Plum) and the eyelet setting kit, a bookmark, white organdy ribbon, and The Tearing Edge. The mini glue dots aren't from SU.

Not much else really to share with you. There's been a lot going on up at the sorority house (and not all of it has been good), and it's been hard. I wish I could talk to all of you about it, but (as you understand, I'm sure), there are confidentiality issues preventing me from doing so. I guess it just suffices to say that this is much harder than I thought it would be. More rewarding too, don't get me wrong (I've already had several tearful heart-to-hearts with some of the girls). I am honored and thrilled to get this opportunity to work with them. And I guess it's not always supposed to be easy. (But is it always supposed to be this hard?) The girls are fantastic and they make me proud to be a part of this sisterhood. I know the challenges will come and go and that they will make the girls stronger and me stronger, too. Just pray for us. And pray for me. I want to do everything right and want to be for them everything they need for me to be.

Speaking of sorority life, yesterday was our alumnae chapter's kick-off event for the 2006-2007 year. This is the first chapter event since I relinquished my presidency (after three years of leadership!). It was a lot of fun. Nothing fancy...just a barbecue at Cedar Lake Park in Olathe. Yowza, it was chilly out there yesterday! And with Curtis and I both recovering from sinus infections, we probably should have brought blankets! Oh well...

I'm off for a bagel and a ride on my exercise bike. Have a wonderful day, friends.

Erin's Big Birthday Weekend

Greetings from BirthdayVille(tm)! This weekend, we're having a weekend-long celebration for Erin's fifth birthday, which is officially this Monday (09/18). My parents are here from Indianapolis, and it's wonderful having them here. Yesterday, we low-keyed it and just enjoyed time together and took Erin out for dinner at her faaaavorite place. Today, she had a big shin-dig at Chuck E. Cheese, and dinner with the whole "unit family" (us, my parents, and Curt's parents), complete with more presents than she can fit in her room. We're overwhelmed with gratitude and joy for the five (!!!) years that we've had our little angel with us. We've gotten lots of photos, and I will try to get those posted soon.

"And he would say, 'I close my eyes and look inside my heart.'"

Children of 9/11 old enough to ask about Daddy
POSTED: 8:32 a.m. EDT, September 11, 2006

NEW YORK (AP) -- Four-year-old Gabriel Jacobs inherited his dad's sandy hair, long nose and blue eyes. The day they buried what was left of his father -- a piece of rib, part of a thigh bone, a bit of one arm -- the boy released a balloon into the air, then turned that familiar face skyward to make sure his daddy caught it.

This is how a son reaches out to the father he never met. Ariel Jacobs died in the World Trade Center attack six days before his only child was born.

"When he sends a balloon up to the sky and he finally sees the tiny dot of the balloon go through the clouds, he says, 'OK, the balloon found the doorway to heaven, I think he has it now," says Gabi's mother, Jenna Jacobs-Dick.

Just now understanding
There are dozens of children like Gabi Jacobs, born to September 11 widows in the months after the attacks. Five years later, as they approach kindergarten, they are just beginning to grasp the stories of their fathers and of the day that changed their lives forever.

The first baby arrived just hours after the disaster, and the last nine months later. Some mothers discovered they were pregnant only after the dads were gone -- including Rudolph Giuliani's longtime aide, who was married to fire Capt. Terence Hatton. The firefighter's daughter was born the next spring, and her mother named her Terri.

Their fathers were rescue workers, cops, restaurant waiters and stockbrokers. Their mothers, pregnant and alone when the dust of the towers settled, worried about the stress on their unborn children from the agony and shock. Some miscarried. One went into labor during her husband's memorial service.

Many moms broke down in the delivery room, where they tried to fill that empty space with photos, a police badge, a piece of clothing. Friends, sisters and in-laws with cameras and brave faces stood in for all those lost dads.

Each delivery was, all at once, wonderful and awful.

Living Legacies
Julie McMahon remembers her son's birth in early 2002 as a day of jangled nerves. "It wasn't supposed to be this way," she thought.

She delivered baby Patrick while her husband, Bobby, a firefighter and high school baseball star, looked on from a photograph on the bedside table. The picture captured a moment of pure happiness -- Bobby, wearing a cap and a giant grin, leans over their first son Matthew, clutching a massive tuft of cotton candy.

Patrick arrived with Bobby's curly hair and lanky body, and has sprouted into a miniature version of his daredevil dad. The child took his mother's breath away recently when he bounded by, swinging his arms and moving his head just so -- it was Bobby's carefree strut.

When James Patrick's son was born, everyone agreed it was like looking at his father -- the same fair skin, blue eyes and brown hair, that certain way he moved his mouth. The Cantor Fitzgerald bond broker, ecstatic about starting a family, died seven weeks before Jack entered the world.

The boy is also playful and silly like his dad. His mother, Terilyn Esse, like many of the other 9/11 moms, cannot explain how the children acquired their fathers' personalities -- the social grace, the twinkling eyes, a love of words or music.

But there is a word they all use to describe it.
"It's bittersweet," says Jacobs-Dick, whose husband was attending a conference at the World Trade Center. "He's a reminder of Ari, not just the fact that he existed, but of who he was because they're so similar, and I can appreciate Ari in the present through him."

Not a replacement
She is careful, though, that Gabi doesn't grow up with the sense that he is here to take the place of his father, who wept at the doctor's office when he learned that the blur on the ultrasound was a boy.

It is an unfair burden for any child who has lost a parent, says Marylene Cloitre, director of the Institute for Trauma and Stress at the New York University Child Study Center. And because of the public tragedy, children of 9/11 victims might always feel pressure to represent something even larger.

"Which is very hard to do when you're 17 and you hardly know what you feel and think yourself," Cloitre said. "Like 'Oh, my father's a hero so I have to carry the heroic memory,' when they don't even know what that is or how to do that."

Cloitre is tracking 700 children who lost parents in the 2001 attack, each a study in grief and hardship.
But the 4-year-olds are unique: They are building images of their fathers from the wisps of other people's memories and photographs, without even the subconscious sense of long ago cuddles or kisses on the forehead.

Full Of Questions
As each child discovers a lost father's life, along come questions: How did Daddy die? Who are the bad guys? Where did the buildings go? When they cleaned up the buildings, did they clean up Daddy, too?

Cloitre says the conversation will change as they grow up. In a few years they will probably want to know whether their fathers would have loved them. As teens, they may wonder about identity -- how am I like him?

"It sort of exhausts people -- they wish it could be over, that they could just say one thing, but really, what to say today pales in the face of the real challenge, which is a lifelong dialogue with their child about who this person was," she said.

Already, some of these children can tell you Daddy died when bad guys took control of some airplanes, and then flew them into the towers. Others haven't even heard the word "terrorist" and don't know there was anything more than a big fire.

"There are always questions and things that come up, and sometimes I'm thinking, 'oh my gosh' -- you try to buy time so you can come up with an answer and do the best you can," says Kimberly Statkevicus, whose second son was born four months after husband Derek died.

Their child, named after his father, turns 5 in January. He knows that a piece of bone was recovered from his father's right hand, and is matter-of-fact about what happened. "My daddy went to work one day and some bad guys came and knocked the buildings down and crushed him like a pancake," he explains.

He wonders why there are no photographs of him and his father, like his brother has. Sometimes, it upsets him.

Finding Answers
Some of the questions of these fatherless children are easy: Did Daddy like mayonnaise or mustard? When he played baseball, did he strike people out?

Other times, they're more spiritual: Does he see me when I ride my bike?
For those answers, Terilyn Esse has taught Jack Patrick there is a special thing he can do.
"When he started to talk, I would ask him, 'Where does Daddy live?' And he would say 'In heaven,' and I would say, 'Who does he live with?"' she said. "And he would say 'With God and the angels,' and I would say 'If you want to talk to Daddy what do you do?'

"And he would say 'I close my eyes and look inside my heart."'

Copyright 2006 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

God bless America. Today and always.

It Counts, Right?

Hi everyone.

You've seen me post before about "Secret Pal" and "Random Act Of Kindness" (or "RAOK") groups that I've been in. Their basic premise is that you seek someone new, find out their interests, and send them a little gift or two to make them smile. It's wonderful, and it's been the source of a lot of joy and new friendships for me. I decided this week to try a new twist on this old favorite. I made a not-so Random-Act-Of-Kindness (or, in JenSpeak(tm), an NS-RAOK), for someone very special to me. Andrea and I met in Indianapolis and were very close friends. We've had our bumps and bruises (mostly because of me...another story for another day), but she's always been right there to support me, love me, listen to me, make me laugh, and to basically just, well, be there. She and her husband moved back to Anderson (which is not far from Indy) a few years ago, and now we're re-connected online. I dedicate my first NS-RAOK to my Adia. The one person who really gets my humor ("drop trou" and "blow ass" and "what the HEAEH-ll?") and the best person to karaoke at Parrotheads with and my favorite fellow "American Idol" fan (other than Erin, of course!).

Here are photos of the card I made for her (remember, please click the photos for larger images):





And here's a photo of her gift:



I was in a hurry to get this RAOK out to her, so it's not much. I crocheted her a washcloth using some Sugar 'n Cream yarn in Playtime" and threw in a bar of Indigo Wild ZUM soap in "Mint" and some peppermint foot lotion for her to pamper herself in minty style. I also included a Vera Bradley photo keychain in "Mesa Red" and a Longaberger coin purse.

For her card, I used the following Stampin' Up products: cardstock (Mellow Moss, Real Red, and Whisper White), inks (Chocolate Chip, Mellow Moss, Real Red, and Ruby Red), stamp sets (the ADORABLE, now-retired "Country Apple," "Love Without End," and "Sincere Salutations"), The Tearing Edge, and buttons in "Handsome Hunter." The glue dots aren't from SU.

So even though I know Andrea and she knew this was coming, it counts as a Random Act Of Kindness, right?

So, So Grateful...

Hi everyone.

I had planned to post here about some general JenInfo(tm)...inane details to anyone other than me about those things that interest me more than anyone else (and yet somehow, you guys still read this blog...go figure). I had it all planned out. I've been cleaning and anxiously anticipating the arrival of my parents this week for Erin's fifth birthday. I've got the makings of a sinus infection. I splurged on new Vera Bradley and some expensive yarns for myself. I've also put together (and photographed) a not-so-random-act-of-kindness for someone dear to my heart, and I'd planned to tell you all about it (and show the photos). And then my mother called me.

She and Daddy were involved in a hit-and-run car accident today. While they are both fine physically, they're both shaken and disheartened by what happened. Somehow, the shock of what could have been (God, I don't even want to THINK about it) and the grateful joy I feel at their safe return home just makes invalid and unimportant anything else I wanted to share with you. I can't even fathom my life without them in it. Even thought 500 miles separate us, we're so, so close. We talk and EMAIL every day. They are my parents. The first loves of my life. The people I most want proud of me (even above my own husband, shame on me for saying so). They have been so good to me, and I am so not ready to face the world without them in it. I am so, so grateful to God for sparing their lives. And I pray for the people who hit them that the experience frightened them in to becoming better, safer drivers (hey, a girl can always hope, right?). If you love someone, please go give that person a big hug and kiss right now. Life is fleeting. And you never know when your loved one will take his or her last breath.

God bless you guys. Thanks for being my friends.

Love,
Jennifer

More Prayers Needed

Hello friends. I need to ask for your prayers again. A very old and very dear friend of our family just lost her husband after, oh goodness, 60+ years of marriage. This woman was the mother of a dear, lifetime friend (Vic) of my mother. Vic died when they were young adults, and Mom and Jean remained friends all these years. Even though Jean and Max were very advanced in age, they still made it a point to come all the way from Des Moines to Indianapolis for our wedding in 2001...something that meant the world to my mother, our family, and me. Jean and Max and their family have meant so much to my mother and her family for so many years, and this loss just breaks my heart. How wonderful for them that they had so, so many years together. Please pray for Jean that her heart and spirit find peace in these last years that she is with us here on Earth.

Here's the card I made for her (as always, please click for a larger image):



(Stampin' Up products used include cardstock in Blush Blossom and Mellow Moss; the "Brighter Tomorrow" and now-retired "Quotes To Live By" stamp sets; inks in Lovely Lilac, Not Quote Navy, and Sahara Sand; white organdy ribbon; and The Tearing Edge. The mini glue-dots aren't from SU.)

Thank you for your prayers and good thoughts.

Much love to you all,
Jen

Farewell, Mate

"Crococile Hunter" Steve Irwin killed.

Although I'm not surprised, I'm certainly saddened. Steve was a familiar character of discussion in our household. We loved his frisky persona and his unabashed way with animals. What a sad loss. I hope his suffering was brief, and wish his family, friends, and many fans blessings of love and comfort and peace.

Ooh la la!!!

Hi everyone. I am f-l-o-a-t-i-n-g! Just got in from a long afternoon of pampering at Mario Tricoci. You may remember me mentioning that Curtis had bought me a facial/pedicure/manicure gift certificate from Tricoci's for a Mother's Day gift. I'd initially planned to use it last weekend (it was the week after recruitment, Erin was going to be up visiting her grandparents, we had a date night planned, etc. etc.), but my car situation put the ka-bosh on that. So I re-booked for today. Oh my, oh my, oh my. It was just wonderful. I had a 90-minute facial/massage, a manicure, a makeover, and my first-ever pedicure. Oh wowsa. I sure feel pretty! And reeeeeeeeelaaaaxed. I was worried there for a while that I might not be able to make the drive home (I'm in a rental...more on that momentarily). It was a devine experience, and I plan to make it a monthly habit to go back for pedicures. Maybe even the facials as well. We'll see. To Wynn, Holly, and Ashley - thank you for making me feel heavenly and beautiful. You ladies rock!

My car is STILL in the shop. Here we are SIX DAYS LATER and our fine friends at Pontiac have no idea what's wrong with my car. Given that (a) the car is a Pontiac and (b) I took it to a Pontiac service center, you'd think that (c) I'd have my car back by now...or at least a solid diagnostic regarding the problem(s) at hand. No such luck. Apparently WonderMechanic(tm) seemed to think that additional eyes were needed to figure out what in tarnation was wrong with my baby Vibe, so he called in a mechanic pal from GM (you're thinking, "this can't be good, Jen"...and I bet you're right). Still no closer to a decision. But I finally broke down and just rented a car today. Poor Curtis...he smiled and patiently took on the role of "Jen's Personal Chauffeur" (to include the l-o-n-g trek from Gardner-to-KCMO-back-to-Gardner twice a day to work), but I felt tremendously guilty, and just broke down and rented a car. Depending on what they find wrong with it (assuming they ever do), I may be finding myself shopping for a new vehicle soon. It's a shame - I loved that little Vibe.

Not much else really new to report on our end. Party plans are in place for Erin's fifth (!!!!) birthday party on the 16th, and my parents are coming out from Indy to celebrate with us. I've missed them something fierce.

Hope that you are all having a wonderful Labor Day weekend, friends. Be safe and enjoy this time off with your loved ones!

Highly Addictive (You've Been Warned!)

Check out this new JenAddiction(tm):

Practice random acts of literacy (and have a good time doing so!) Check out this highly addictive website and learn more!

Be forewarned, however. It's addictive!

(Now if I could just figure out why no one can find any of my books!)

A quick "happy birthday" to someone special from my yesterday. He celebrates birthday #35 today. May every blessing and joy be with him today and forever.